Farang Trousers
Saturday, 27 November 2004
Buying a pair of trousers is a traumatic experience in any situation, never mind when the female section of the population are a size eight at the biggest...
Due to the fact that the skin on my legs is now almost completely obscured by old jellyfish stings and large pulasting mosquito bites, one of which is now an inch in diameter and pulses red and white when I strighten my leg, I decided it was time for action. Trousers must be bought. Trousers must be impregnated with anti moquito stuff and worn. Either that or a chemical warfare suit (I did find one of these at Karbi market actually). In my quest to find trousers that will fit my wide arse I found a lovely range of tiny tight jeans which didn't even have a hope in hell of getting over my calves, the remaining choice: FARANG TROUSERS. These are the trousers that are worn by the people with the same same but different Tshirts, who are 18 blonde and come from the home counties(sorry Sarah Todd and Doc Kate) and say stuff like yah, I'm really into budhism, whist touring temples in a bikini top. Not only this but its the way the things look.... like.. like.. well like there shoule be a kingsized nappy around your arse but its not there so like ugh well I will put a photo up so you can see the full horror later. For medical interest I might add one of my legs, truely, the largest of the bites does look like an alien could burst out of it at any moment. After buying the wretched things I had to wear them and after wearing them I was forced to drink a vast amount of beer to make up for the trauma. Fucking Moquito bastards.
On November 27, 2004, Dan said:
One of the bites on Catherines leg actually visibly pulsates and changes colour slightly. It's really quite amazing.
On November 28, 2004, Dad and Barb said:
Hi Catharine
You should try the "wee" thing, it really is supposed to do the trick for the jellyfish, but not sure about the mozies!!! Apart from covering from head to foot and spraying with mozi spray there's no other answer....... unless you stay indoors from dusk to dawn and don't drink beer - but that's too damn boring so I'm afraid you'll have to suffer them "fucking mozzi bastards" .... I have every sympathy with you coz they get me too!!!!!!
No mozzi's here in Rotarua but it stinks like hell!!!!!
On November 28, 2004, Dan said:
Catherine doesn't want me to wee on her for some reason. Some people just won't accept a favour. Tut tut.
On November 28, 2004, mum said:
be quick with the photo of the farang trousers cathrine i cant wait to see them and i am sorry about your bites hope they get better soon lyn.
On November 28, 2004, JACKO said:
HI COOL WEBSITE. LOOKING FORWARD TO PHOTOS OF CATHERINES TROUSERS. HAVE FUN ON YOURS TRAVELS. PS TAKE IT FROM A NURSE THE WEE THING IS MEANT TO WORK! ALTHOUGH PERSONALLY NOT TRIED IT. TAKE CARE SARAH J (JACKO)
On November 29, 2004, Kev-La said:
With reference to Catherine's pulsating leg: Did you feed her after midnight?
On November 29, 2004, bryony said:
Shit, i've got some of them! far from flattering, but ample on my butt - hurrah! and i have to admit, i do use them religiously for yoga! my god, what has become of me?!?! as for the mossies, aparently eating garlic is a preventative (bolocks if you ask me) as is not eating meat (asehole this time, in my opinion), but i get bitten like hell and ware farang trowsers, so dont listwen to me. play safe, b.
On December 01, 2004, Dan said:
A ha! hello Bryony. I don't think they look to bad actually apart from being standard issue traveller gear.
I, of course, am still wearing my jeans. I don't care what climate Im in. They seem to get a certain amount of respect (or pisstaking - cant tell) from the locals though.
Lot's of people shout "Yo, yo yo! Hip Hop!" at me when they see me.
Ive got some pictures to put up of Catherine's trousers so you can marvel yourself at thier glory.