Random Crap in Chaing Mai
Saturday, 18 December 2004
A disease stopped to bar my path. "Who are you that you dare stand in the path of the Mighty Traynor?" I asked "I am highly trained in the arts of warfare, child monging and disease combat, step back, throw down your arms and I will let you leave with your life". A mighty battle ensued...
At first it seemed like the mighty Traynor would not win, so smote down was she with high frequency, low viscosity, high velocity emissions caused by the lowley disease bringer's dark magic. But she parried and fought with an admirable irrepressibility, the disease brought down upon her nausea and she smote it back with her magic powders. At last the fateful blow was made; the dioreah stuck out its sharpened sword in what was intended to be a death blow to the bowel regions but the now much less weighty traynor spang to the side and avoided the blow in a sprightly move and brought down her mighty cudgel upon the diseases head, causing fatal damage. The disease fled to the southern mountains where its spirit cowers in shame, and it's body is turning slowly to dirt.
Special thanks to Daz for providing Monkey for me to read while I had the shits.
On December 18, 2004, Dad and Barb said:
Hi Catherine.... wow.... I asked for some bowel action.... and by golly we got it.... fantastic! glad you won the war.... look forward to the next battle!
UNTIL NEXT TIME!
On December 20, 2004, Catherine said:
Alas, poor Traynor! The spirit of the disease cunningly changed it's form into that of a small piece of Tofu. "Ha ha ha ha," it chuckled to itself, "I am not beaten so easily, I will use my acid repelling trick so that I can enter the body of the mighty Traynor and defeat her from within." Dear Traynor! Once Disease had made it's way to her intesines it strangled her guts and smote her down from within with it's spikey sword. It looked like she was done for "what can I do" thought the mighty one. "I know..." She took one of her hairs and bit it into seven peices and swallowed. The seven pieces turned into tiny replicas of her and brought down the unsuspecting disease in a clever ambush. Never again will I underestimate the power of tofu thought Traynor. If you want to know whether the battle continued you will have to listen to the next episode of BOWELWATCH!
On December 22, 2004, Kevin, Leader of the Pigeon Army said:
Mighty art thou, O Catherine! The lofty heights of Pigeon Heaven are teeming with tales of your invincible tummy.